I realize that posting this on my blog is infantile, even stupid, but I figure that everyone will know exactly what it is that I expect to be done upon the ending of my life, without dispute and thusly, here it goes:
My Will And Testament
by: Markel Scott Marin III Rulez!
In the following document I shall instruct my family and friends as to how my estate and all worldly possessions shall be divided amongst all of my acquaintances.
Firstly, comes the issue of my personal and business relations concerning my religion of Ryanism. I find it to be the most responsible decision I could make to hand down this asset to the longest standing member and first revenue of Ryanism, Fran Tarkenton.
Next, is the issue of my holdings in the company of FAFS (Funny As Fucking Shit). Although these were lost I expect my older brother, Fartface Jumboleer, to continue them as long as he shall live, even if it should create a large amount of inconvenience for him, just as I did during my legacy.
Speaking of my legacy, I must demand that Fartface also write my biography under the pen name of “El Reggaeton Lover Numero Uno Mil, Punto Veinte.” If this task is not carried out within three weeks of my death it should become common knowledge that my soul is not at ease and won’t be until the death of my brother soothes it.
As for The Worst Story of All Time, I strangely leave this to Carrot Top to finish, partly because he gave me inspiration for the story and partly because he might be the only one that could ever get it published. He’s a pretty powerful man.
I wouldn’t feel right without giving away my awesome sense of humor, and thusly, will give it away to Steven Segal. He seems to need it the most. Maybe it’s time for a buddy film Stevie. Or at least a friggin chill pill.
Next, may well be the most important/ unimportant assets I have in my possession today. My well-kempt, incredibly tight, hot, loose, unsettling, sometimes scary to little children, combo of monkey’s uncle and carpenter’s, ass. Robert Kelly, you may have been wondering why your name popped up on some dude’s blog when you asked for hot pictures of R. Kelly’s well-kempt ass. Well, I’ll tell you:
When you type in a search make sure not to be in a hurry, cause sometimes you may type too many things in. It’s important to be concise and keep your words nice, cause when you type certain things in that can be tied in to pornographic material, you can be led to an adult search engine. Since nobody wants that, be sure not to type too fast or else you’ll end up like R. Kelly. And if you think that you are ever committing an act similar to that which is on that gratuitous porn you watched the other day in a video that was supposed to have been an ad for Sprite, then you are probably R. Kelly.
Anyway, my ass is to be lopped off, stuck on a pole, and inserted into the peak of the highest mountain in the world, Mount Hugemongous Mountain I don’t know the name of.
That’s it for now.
My Will And Testament
by: Markel Scott Marin III Rulez!
In the following document I shall instruct my family and friends as to how my estate and all worldly possessions shall be divided amongst all of my acquaintances.
Firstly, comes the issue of my personal and business relations concerning my religion of Ryanism. I find it to be the most responsible decision I could make to hand down this asset to the longest standing member and first revenue of Ryanism, Fran Tarkenton.
Next, is the issue of my holdings in the company of FAFS (Funny As Fucking Shit). Although these were lost I expect my older brother, Fartface Jumboleer, to continue them as long as he shall live, even if it should create a large amount of inconvenience for him, just as I did during my legacy.
Speaking of my legacy, I must demand that Fartface also write my biography under the pen name of “El Reggaeton Lover Numero Uno Mil, Punto Veinte.” If this task is not carried out within three weeks of my death it should become common knowledge that my soul is not at ease and won’t be until the death of my brother soothes it.
As for The Worst Story of All Time, I strangely leave this to Carrot Top to finish, partly because he gave me inspiration for the story and partly because he might be the only one that could ever get it published. He’s a pretty powerful man.
I wouldn’t feel right without giving away my awesome sense of humor, and thusly, will give it away to Steven Segal. He seems to need it the most. Maybe it’s time for a buddy film Stevie. Or at least a friggin chill pill.
Next, may well be the most important/ unimportant assets I have in my possession today. My well-kempt, incredibly tight, hot, loose, unsettling, sometimes scary to little children, combo of monkey’s uncle and carpenter’s, ass. Robert Kelly, you may have been wondering why your name popped up on some dude’s blog when you asked for hot pictures of R. Kelly’s well-kempt ass. Well, I’ll tell you:
When you type in a search make sure not to be in a hurry, cause sometimes you may type too many things in. It’s important to be concise and keep your words nice, cause when you type certain things in that can be tied in to pornographic material, you can be led to an adult search engine. Since nobody wants that, be sure not to type too fast or else you’ll end up like R. Kelly. And if you think that you are ever committing an act similar to that which is on that gratuitous porn you watched the other day in a video that was supposed to have been an ad for Sprite, then you are probably R. Kelly.
Anyway, my ass is to be lopped off, stuck on a pole, and inserted into the peak of the highest mountain in the world, Mount Hugemongous Mountain I don’t know the name of.
That’s it for now.
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